John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth-- Worked to create and define Attachment Theory
Attachment Theory seems to be everywhere right now-- Instagram, Youtube, TikTok. People want to know what their attachment style is just as fervently as they want to know their astrological sign or MBTI. One can find a plethora of online quizzes just by typing in Attachment Style to a search engine. Here's a quiz you can take if you're wondering what yours might be!
This attention to attachment theory brings into focus how we form attachments in childhood, and more specifically, how we plan to resolve and cope with our caregivers' attentiveness (or lack thereof) in adulthood. Whether one is anxious, avoidant, disorganized, or secure, these styles deeply affect adult relationships and how one seeks emotional safety.
The attachment styles are pretty fixed, aka, difficult to change without some serious self-reflection and work in a positive therapeutic setting. But, in early childhood education, educators have the unique power to be well-informed and conscious of how they contribute to the formation of a child's attachment, and to set their students up for success. Our responsiveness during feedings, diaper changes, play, tummy time, naps, and moments of distress, impacts an infant's trust in their caregivers.
So how do we make sure we don't mess it up?
It all begins with understanding what attachment is, and its stages.
In Miriam Crouch's article Attachment: What is it and Why is it so Important? She states:
"Attachment is a reciprocal process by which an emotional connection develops between an infant and his/her primary caregiver. It influences the child’s physical, neurological, cognitive and psychological development. It becomes the basis for development of basic trust or mistrust, and shapes how the child will relate to the world, learn, and form relationships throughout life (Association for Treatment and Training in the Attachment of Children (ATTACh), 2015). The time considered crucial for the development of attachment bonds is in the first three years of life, and this bond influences relationships throughout the life span. An attachment disorder occurs due to traumatic disruption or other interferences with the caregiver-child bond during the first years of life (ATTACh, 2015). Attachment issues could be seen as a continuum, with disorders at the extreme end, then a variety of attachment-related difficulties and lesser behavioral and emotional problems, through to secure attachment."
This sounds scary, but forming a secure attachment with a child is a lot simpler than it sounds, and making small mistakes as a caregiver doesn't lead to life long disorder, nor does not being present 100% of the time, or letting a child cry it out, etc.
Let's talk about the stages:
Asocial Stage 0-6 weeks. Babies don’t distinguish between humans, although there is a clear preference for humans over non-humans. The infants form attachment with anyone who comes their way.
In a group care setting, an infant in this stage will not care who feeds, holds, or naps them and cannot distinguish primary caregivers.
Indiscriminate Stage 6 weeks – 6 months. The bonds with their caregivers start to grow stronger. Infants begin to distinguish people from one another, and they do not have a fear of strangers.
In a group care setting, an infant in this stage will not suffer from separation anxiety but will show discomfort with unstable caregiving environments and react to stress and negativity from their caregivers. This is a critical stage for forming secure attachment in later infancy.
Specific Attachment Stage 7+ months. This is when separation anxiety becomes prevalent, particularly from their main caregivers or close adults. At this point, infants develop a feeling of distress when surrounded by strangers.
This stage can be exciting for caregivers because they'll notice their child is more engaged with their environment, play, and reciprocates loving attention when given. In a group care setting, the infant will prefer one or more teachers over the others, and will seek their interaction.
Multiple Attachments Stage 10+ months. Attachment with the infant’s primary caregiver grows even stronger. The infant is increasingly interested in creating bonds with others that are not their caregivers.
In a group care setting, the infant's attachment figure will provide a secure base for the infant to explore their environment independently and safely. The infant will also have a preference for who naps, feeds, changes, and holds them--showing distress when that person is not one of their primary attachments. They may also display jealousy when their caregiver gives attention to other children.
Four Attachment Styles (According to Cleveland Clinic)
Secure: Babies form secure attachments when their caregivers consistently fulfill a baby’s physical and emotional needs. Babies who are securely attached prefer their primary caregiver over other people and are calmed by their presence.
Anxious: Babies whose primary caregivers aren’t consistent in meeting a baby’s needs are more likely to form an anxious attachment. Anxiously attached babies learn that they may or may not get the attention they need, so they aren’t easily comforted by their caregivers.
Avoidant: Avoidant attachment is most likely to form when a caregiver doesn’t provide a baby with sufficient emotional support. The caregiver’s responsiveness to the baby most likely ends with caring for their physical needs, like feeding and bathing, but the caregiver doesn’t provide the emotional comfort the baby also needs. In that environment, the baby learns not to rely on others to care for their emotional needs.
Disorganized: Disorganized attachment often forms through a particularly tumultuous childhood — often one that may be marked by fear or trauma. It typically stems from an erratic or incoherent relationship with the baby’s primary caregiver.
Tips to form secure attachments in group care:
Being present with an infant in a group care setting means giving each child under your care enough time to be prioritized during feedings, naps, and play, especially during the Specific Attachment Stage (7+ months) when they're actively forming bonds with their adults. Pay attention to their cues and schedule so you can accurately determine what they need when they cry. Is is a bottle? Food? Diaper change? Are they sleepy? Did they get hurt? Did something scare them?
Comfort them when they are sad. Be patient during meals and make those moments mean something. If they're going to sleep or need to eat, move to a quieter area, sit in a cozy chair, hold the baby in a comfortable position, make sure the bottle is a good temperature if you're feeding them, and look into the child's eyes as they drink or fall asleep. Eye contact is everything!
Take this time to sing, talk, gently stroke their arms or legs (studies have shown that affectionate touch builds critical neural pathways in the somatosensory system of the infants brain.) Smile and infuse peace and love into the moment. It helps to make sure the room is adequately staffed within ratio, that toddlers are occupied, and younger infants are in a safe location while you're feeding your child. All teachers know how stressful it can be when the room is in disarray while you're busy with one baby. Other infants may cry or want to be held while you are giving a bottle, but try to give your attention to the hungry or sleepy baby, letting other teachers help out to attend the others.
Once you're done, rejoin the rest of the classroom so they know you're still present. Make sure each child gets to spend time with you and the other staff members so no one feels abandoned, neglected, or angry.
Forming a secure attachment also means self-regulating during moments of stress or anger so the child is not negatively affected. Let's face it, working with kids of any age can be frustrating, irritating, and overwhelming at times. How we move through those feelings during the day is critical. It's inappropriate to snap at a child, disregard their parents or schedule, raise ones voice, make mean comments, become physically aggressive, or ignore a baby, etc. Ensuring your reactions are gentle and responsive is key!
If it's not possible to remain calm or kind in the moment, the best thing you can do is leave the classroom or put the baby in their crib (not for too long) and take a break. All caregivers need breaks to regulate and de-stress. Sometimes when we neglect our needs, the children suffer too. Drink water, have a snack, or do some deep breathing... A child's attachment to you is stronger when you know your stress limits and take a step back instead of making a mistake.
Laughter and play is important too. Explore new things alongside your babies. Touch, dance, read, and sing with them. Getting on their level brings you into their world and into their hearts. Be present. Earning their trust is easy when you enter into their space as a joyful and compassionate caregiver.
Check out this article from the Cleveland Clinic website
Visit the Attachment Project for more information
Read these articles by Elaine Scharfe and Miriam Crouch on Attachment Theory to learn about its history and application
Look at this cool study on affectionate touch
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